Sand Vipers
by ChaosHasCome
Summary: Kyouya takes a trip with Nile. Egypt is not everything he expected. He expected sand and snakes and heat. He did not expect infidels, blind dates, and nosy grandmothers.


**A/N: So this is a one(two) shot- I haven't entirely decided- that is directly related to The Flip Side of Perfection. I suppose you _could_ read it stand-alone but it's expanded upon in Flip Side. **

**But almost all of it will make sense if you read it stand-alone.**

**This is the story of Kyouya's first visit to Musa- Nile's home village- and the resulting events that follow. Bro-mance, Egyptian stalkers, nosy grandmothers, and sand vipers will ensue. Be prepared. Ye be warned. **

**Oh and we'll see Seth, Isis, and Nile's Nannaa. What a crazy family. **

**Sand Vipers**

Musa was small and cramped. Kyouya shouldered his pack as he stepped into town with Nile, immediately wary of the confined streets and lopsided buildings. A red, dusty layer of sand blanketed the entire village. Kyouya could hear the faint sounds of the river in the background, under the shouting of small children and scolding mothers. Something glided across the ground, slithering towards them with its scales blending almost flawlessly in with the sand.

The _thing_ glided ever closer and Kyouya could hear the blood pounding in his ears. "Nile! Is that a-a snake?" Kyouya thought his heart would fly into his throat. It wasn't that he was afraid of snakes per say, he just preferred they stayed away from him. Far, far, _far_ away from him. And this one was much too close for comfort.

Kyouya could feel a headache coming on.

"Yeah, it's just a sand viper. Ignore it and it'll ignore you." Nile calmly stepped around the snake- which had taken up residence at their feet- and began walking towards the far end of the road. Kyouya stood rooted to the spot. Nile turned around, a mocking laughter filling his eyes. "You're not _afraid,_ are you?"

Kyouya growled indignantly. "No! Why would I be afraid of something like a _snake?_" He clenched his fists and took a step forward. The snake lifted its head to stare at him. Kyouya froze once more, sweat beading on the back of his neck. Taking deep, calming breaths, Kyouya shoved his hands in his pockets. He grasped the cool metal of Leone, feeling his partner's power and strength flood through his veins. Trying to appear casual, Kyouya stepped around the viper, careful not to step on it. The last thing he needed was some feral snake biting him. God knows what sort of disease _that_ would give him. Could snakes be rabid?

He stopped beside Nile, pretending not to notice that his best friend's shoulders were shaking in uncontrollable laughter. "We're not in Metal City any more Kyouya."

Kyouya ignored his friend and held his head high, placing his trademark scowl on his face and striding forward nonchalantly.

Only to find himself sampling the red Egyptian sand.

It didn't taste nice.

Scrambling to his feet, Kyouya looked around angrily. Standing in front of him was a brown skinned little boy with dark eyes, waving his wooden 'sword' at Kyouya menacingly. Or at least, Kyouya thought it was _supposed_ to be menacing. But it's hard to take any one seriously when they're three feet tall and stark naked.

Kyouya choked. Why wasn't this child wearing clothes? Was he really so poor? Kyouya was jarred out of his thoughts when a very sharp pain shot through his shins. He looked down to see the little boy beating at his legs with his wooden stick. Kyouya was too shocked to be annoyed.

Nile sighed and removed the boy's weapon from his chubby hand. "Tau, why did you hit Kyouya?"

The little boy glared at Nile and kicked him. "Give me my sword back! He's an infidel and Omari says infidels are bad and must be kept away. " They boy punctuated with a swift kick that had Kyouya gritting his teeth. Nile sighed and crossed his arms.

"Tau, do you know what an infidel is?"

"A bad guy." Kyouya rolled his eyes.

Nile sighed again and ruffled the boys hair. "Kyouya is my best friend. He's no infidel. But I'll keep a look out for them and let you know when I see one." Tau nodded and snatched the sword away from Nile's grasp, grinning maniacally. He departed to find 'Omari' with another sharp hit to Kyouya's shins.

"Well damn."

"Yeah. That's Tau. Did you know his name means 'lion' in Egyptian?" Nile laughed.

Kyouya just glared.

Sometime later, Kyouya found himself sprawled lazily across Nile's couch. His head ached and his shins hurt worse. He rubbed vigorously at his temples in attempt to stem the throbbing. Aside from Tau, Kyouya had met quite a few of the village children, all of whom seemed to flock to Nile.

There was Tor and Zuberi, twin boys who pestered both Kyouya and Nile for beyblading tips with a persistence unrivaled by anything Kyouya had encountered before.

There were sisters Eshe and Halima, two gentle girls who practically worshiped the ground Nile walked on. They almost completely ignored Kyouya, which suited him just fine. Until he heard them gossiping about him to Heqet and Nefertari in the market place.

He had met the infamous Omari, a boy of ten, who still believed that he knew everything there was to know about the world. Kyouya wasn't too fond of him. He had, after all, encouraged Tau to beat Kyouya with a stick.

Kyouya had quite firmly decided he never wanted children.

Now, Kyouya and Nile were just waiting for his family to arrive home. Nile's parents had died when he was young and he had only an older brother. His grandmother and cousin lived just down the road. They were the only family Nile had.

The door burst open, a very sweaty young man entering, along with a gust of wind that carried a strong enough scent of body odor that Kyouya had to repress his urge to gag.

He settled for wrinkling his nose and blinking his eyes rapidly to prevent the oncoming watery tears.

"Nile. Long time no see little bro." He nodded at his brother before striding over and ruffling Nile's hair, earning himself a fierce glare and accompanying scowl. He raised an eyebrow and jerked his head in Kyouya's direction. "That him?" Nile nodded, still glowering. His brother shrugged, turning fully towards Nile and beginning to outline the details of his most recent 'sand race.' Whatever that was.

Kyouya took the moment to study his friend's brother. Nile had told him that his brother, Seth, wasn't a blader and Kyouya appraised him as such. He was surprised to see how muscled the older boy was. Every inch of him seemed to be hard muscle or gritty sinew. He was tall and lithe, probably quite agile. His black hair was tousled and fell across his green eyes. They were only a shade darker than Nile's, Kyouya noticed. Kyouya also noticed that Seth was dripping in sweat, his thin shirt soaked through. Probably because of this 'sand racing' that he had just been participating in. His skin was darkly suntanned, darker even than Nile's skin but a few shade's lighter than Demure.

Kyouya turned his attention away from Seth and towards his Leone. He wished he'd taken his bey to Madoka before he'd left with Nile; Leone seemed to be in rough shape. He shrugged. No blading for him then. Whatever. He was supposed to be on vacation anyways. He scoffed. As if he knew the meaning of the word.

"You a blader then?" Kyouya was startled out of his inspection of Leone by Seth's voice. He nodded tersely, content to generally ignore the older boy. Apparently Seth didn't have any intentions of being ignored. Shoving Kyouya over, he plopped himself down next to him on the couch and attempted to engage Kyouya in completely meaningless small talk for all of five minutes.

When that didn't work, he tried asking Kyouya about himself. Did he have siblings? What's Metal City like? Did he have a girlfriend? Did he like anyone? How many battles has he won?

After realizing this tactic was getting him nowhere, Seth switched strategies to something that he was much better at.

Talking about himself.

For the next hour, Kyouya was subjected to endless lists of people Seth knew or had dated or had beaten in a race. Kyouya also found out more than he ever needed -or wanted- to know about sand racing (which he had to admit impressed him a little) and also about how hot and wonderful and hot and nice and _did he mention _hot Seth's girlfriend, Bastet, was. She sounded mind numbingly dull to Kyouya. She didn't blade, she baked. She didn't travel, she was a homebody. She didn't argue, she agreed with _everything _Seth said. She was attractive but not in the least intelligent from what he'd gathered. Kyouya didn't know how Seth could stand her.

Kyouya wanted a girl who was passionate about beyblading, even if she didn't blade herself. She needed a temper, she needed to be willing to argue with him. He wanted someone who's head wasn't filled with vapid thoughts about clothes or shopping or hair. He wanted a real girl who could keep up with him and match his attitude.

What he wanted was for Seth to shut up.

Apparently what he wanted didn't matter though. Which was made obvious by the fact Nile had abandoned him to his brother, who seemed capable of talking anyone to death. The youth had a big enough ego for ten men, Kyouya thought. He was just getting the hang of tuning out the senseless chatter by the time Nile returned to the house, an arrival which was punctuated by a foreign smell that seemed to be rising from a woven basket held in his arms.

Seth cocked his head to the side and grinned. "Nannaa?" Nile nodded in confirmation.

Nile smirked at Kyouya. "You've never eaten until you've eaten my Nannaa's food." He pulled out a fully roasted fish, complete with the eyes and head. "Trust me, you'll love it."

Somehow, Kyouya highly doubted that.

OoOoOoOoO

The sun rose high in the sky before Kyouya managed to rouse himself enough to leave the room in which he was staying. Dragging himself towards the bathroom, Kyouya noted the empty state of the house and figured Nile must have taken off to do...well, Kyouya wasn't exactly sure what Nile actually _did._ He shrugged. He'd just go exploring on his own.

He almost choked when he saw the reflection staring back at him in the mirror. The humidity in the air had not done his unruly hair any favors. It sprung up around his head in a green halo, having completely escaped the leather tie holding it in place. He sighed. It would take at least an hour to fix. Kyouya wasn't particularly vain, nor did he care about what others thought of him, but he couldn't very well walk around in public with a...a bush sitting atop his head. He didn't aspire to look like Gingka.

Stripping down, Kyouya stepped into the shower and allowed the water to run down his body. Unlike most of the houses in Musa, Nile's place had running water, for which he was thankful. He was not thankful, however, when the water suddenly turned ice cold after five minutes.

The villagers swore they could hear him yelling all the way across the town.

Kyouya was happy that was all they had been able to hear. He wasn't quite proud of the string of profanities that had escaped his mouth, although he had to admit his vocabulary was quite impressive. He turned back towards the mirror with determination, a brush and leather band in his grasp.

The villagers made sure to cover their children's ears upon hearing the expletives drifting from the open window.

OoOoOoOoO

Kyouya stalked down the sprawling streets of Musa, thoroughly irritated with the way his morning had been playing out. His hair was still a mess that resembled some sort of shrubbery, despite all the time he'd spent trying to tame it. He had a throbbing headache because someone, probably Nile's idiot brother Seth, had forgotten to buy coffee. Or maybe, he thought, this god forsaken place didn't _have_ coffee. This seemed more likely. After all, Musa seemed to be his own personal hell.

The sun beat down on his neck, causing sweat to run down his back and bead on his forehead. He swiped it away. The sand billowed up with every step he took, sticking to his shoes and settling in the creases of his shirt and pants. Small children ran past him and Kyouya slipped into the shadow of a clay building as Tau ran by, brandishing his wooden sword. Still naked. Probably searching for more infidels, Kyouya thought, scowling. The bruises on his legs seemed to throb.

Once the little menace had passed out of sight, Kyouya continued on his walk. He was headed towards the market place, hoping to find Nile there. Perhaps he'd even find something to tame the throbbing in his temples. He'd give the local color some financial support. For all he knew though, the cure for a headache could be camel dung or dog liver.

Kyouya decided against buying homemade remedies from the locals.

Kyouya almost tripped over five different sleeping cats on his quest to find the market. The cursed things were sprawled across the road and covered so thickly in red dust that Kyouya thought at first they were dead. Until they began hissing and scratching and being _alive._

Kyouya avoided cats now.

He finally stumbled across the bazaar mid-afternoon. Stalls were lined up haphazardly and the noise of vendors hawking their wares was deafening. The smell of rotting..._something_ filled his nostrils and he carefully avoided that particular area of the market. As he strolled along, searching for his friend, he admired some of the handmade items on display for purchase. He didn't buy anything. After some careful looking- in which he was forcefully dragged to at least _seven_ different stalls- he located Nile.

Nile was leaning against the wooden frame of an older lady's stall. She had black hair threaded through with gray and deep laugh lines were etched around her eyes and mouth. Her skin was dark and wrinkled, her hands knotted and worn. She was laughing and talking to his best friend and Kyouya realized with a jolt that this must be Nile's Nannaa. Approaching slowly, Kyouya sidled up next to his friend. The conversation stopped and Kyouya was quite certain he _did not like_ that look in the back of the older woman's eyes.

"Handsome boy, your friend. Nile, how old did you say he was?" Her voice was surprisingly smooth for someone of her years. She seemed to completely ignore Kyouya's presence. Upon Nile's response, she smiled. "Good good. I'll tell Isis to be ready by seven. Tell your friend to be presentable and at our home by then. And do make sure he does something with that wild thing he calls hair." With a satisfied grin, she sat back and waved her hand, a clear dismissal. Nile dragged him away from the stall.

What had just happened? "What just happened?" Kyouya asked Nile, his face barely concealing his puzzlement.

Nile had the decency to look embarrassed. "She just set you up on a date with my cousin Isis."

_What?_ "**What**?" Kyouya exploded. "A date? Who does she think she is? Busy body, match making, old woman!"

Nile laughed. "That's exactly who she thinks she is. A match maker. Though I'd be careful not to mention the old, busy bodied part around her. She might not appreciate that." At the look on Kyouya's face, Nile shrugged. "You might as well go through with it. It wouldn't be the first time she's done something like this. Isis isn't so bad, really."

"I'll be the judge of that," Kyouya grumbled.

This was going to be a long night.

OoOoOoOoO

"You broke it?" Nile's laughter filled the room as he doubled over, his bey, Vulcan Horuseus, glinting in what Kyouya thought was a mocking manner. Kyouya crossed his arms over his bare chest.

"Maybe you should buy a sturdier brush. Then it wouldn't break." Kyouya resumed his frantic tugging, trying to loosen the bristles' grip on his pine green hair.

"Or you could cut your hair. Then maybe it wouldn't be capable of snapping my brush in two." Nile snorted with laughter once more, making no attempt to help his friend. He watched in amusement as, with one last giant tug, the brush pulled loose of Kyouya's hair.

Kyouya stared in shock down at the offensive object.

Not only had the brush pulled loose, so had some of his hair.

Kyouya whimpered.

Nile laughed.

It was six o'clock.

OoOoOoOoO

"Wear this." Kyouya was promptly hit in the face with an aqua colored shirt.

"I am _not _wearing that." Kyouya tossed the hideous shirt to the floor. "It's _blue. _Do I look like Gingka to you?"

Nile's head popped out of the closest and he narrowed his eyes in concentration. "I don't know...the resemblance is definitely there...I think it's the hair." Nile ducked back into the closest just as a shoe went flying past his head. "Wear this." An orange vest landed on his lap.

Kyouya swore heavily.

Nile laughed and ducked.

It was six thirty.

OoOoOoOoO

Nile shoved him toward the front door of the sand-coated house. "Good luck. You'll need it." Nile ducked out of the way of Kyouya's fist and laughed, trotting down the road to his house. Kyouya groaned. Squared his shoulders. He'd take it like a man.

He'd just raised his fist to knock when the door opened, revealing a girl with wispy black hair and wide brown eyes. She clasped him in a hug immediately. Kyouya awkwardly patted her on the back. Over the girl's head- she was short, he realized- Nannaa was watching, Kyouya noticed. He forced a smile on his face that was betrayed by the cool glint of his eyes. It was on.

It was seven fifteen.

OoOoOoOoO

Nile had suggested taking Isis to Ra's Kitchen. The restaurant had a bustling atmosphere and it was nothing that inherently suggested romance. It was a tiny adobe building and one entered through a side door in one of Musa's vast sprawling alleys. The inside was simple. Everything was covered in gritty sand. Even the food. Kyouya was satisfied that this could give her no aspirations for anything more.

Isis clung to his arm the entire time, even while he was trying to eat. He gritted his teeth and dealt with it. Occasionally she was alright to talk with. And occasionally- or not so occasionally- he found himself wondering what it would feel like to rip out her hair. He thought it would grant him immense satisfaction.

When dinner was finished, Isis continued talking and chattering. She wanted to show him this and this and this and just about everything else there was in Musa, from pebble to sand viper. Kyouya sat beside her stiffly and grudgingly paid their bill. He knew where Nile kept his money. He'd just steal some of it tonight for...reparations.

That thought brought him immense pleasure.

The evening continued with a stroll through Musa. The sun was glowing red on the horizon.

It was eight thirty.

OoOoOoOoO

Isis dragged him to a small 'park' located down the road from Nile's. It didn't look much like the parks Kyouya was familiar with. Instead of trees, there were tall abandoned termite mounds. Replacing lush grass was red sand and brown dirt. He sat on bench made of carefully sculpted stone, rather than smooth metal. The dress shirt he had donned for this 'occasion' was itchy and he tugged irritatedly at his collar. Isis removed his hand from the offending article and held it in her own, her other hand smoothing the wrinkles away from the creased linen.

She looked down at their hands and began playing with his fingers. Kyouya resisted the urge to pull away and growl at her. It was much too intimate a gesture for him to be allowing _her_ but social situations had never been Kyouya's strong point. He was more of a bey battle **now **and ask questions **later **sort of guy. Finally, after he couldn't stand the silence, he told her, "Isis, we're just friends." He pulled his hands out of hers. "I'm only interested in your friendship." And not even that, Kyouya thought.

Isis didn't look the least put out by his declaration, instead making one of her own. "Oh Kyouya, you're so sweet. But I'll wait for you. You'll come around eventually. And as a reminder of my promise to wait-" she placed both hands on either side of his face and mashed her lips ungracefully against his. It was wet and disgusting and Kyouya fervently prayed he was dreaming. She separated their mouths with a disgusting _smack!_ that made Kyouya want to gag. Thankfully, he was able to refrain from puking.

Barely.

"I think I should leave now." Kyouya hightailed it away from the insane female. Were all members of this gender so...strange?

Kyouya got his answer as Isis called out from behind him, "Remember! I'll be waiting for you!" Kyouya repressed a shudder.

Perhaps crazy was a better word.

He firmly decided he would never get married.

It was nine o'clock.

OoOoOoOoO

"She did what?" Nile almost fell off the bed laughing.

Kyouya scowled and leaned back against the chair he was currently lounging in. "She followed me around town and threatened Heqet and Nefertari just because they said hello. She's crazy, Nile," Kyouya growled, sulking. It had been three days since he'd taken Isis out on a 'date.' Today was the first day he'd dared to leave the house. And she had stalked him around Musa relentlessly.

Nile leaned back against the headboard, hands behind his head. "I'll talk to her. See if I can't get her to control herself." Nile muttered something under his breath that sounded suspiciously like _I doubt it. _Kyouya narrowed his eyes and glared.

"I'm sure if she can't control herself, then you'll be able to _persuade_ her to leave me alone." Nile just started laughing once more.

"No one _persuades_ Isis to do anything. She has a mind of her own. You just try controlling her. See where it gets you. Probably tied to a bed somewhere." Nile shuddered; Kyouya mirrored the action.

They were silent for a while, each lost in their own thoughts. Then, "I'm never coming back here again. Too many busy bodies and snakes."

A pause. A laugh. "I know, Kyouya."

OoOoOoO

Now it was a year later and here he stood, a brunette by his side, confronted with the same village and the risk of running across Isis, Tau, and Nannaa very high.

He was a masochist.

There was no other explanation.

**A/N: Whew! Nine pages long. Quite a bit more than I normally write. I hope you all enjoy Kyouya's visit to Nile's village and if you don't understand the last three paragraphs, it would be because you have not yet read The Flip Side of Perfection: Chapter Six. **

**Thoughts? Did you love it? Hate it? Did you think it was funny? Favorite scene? Favorite character? **

**Much love, **

**Chaos **


End file.
